Funny…I don’t feel like that

As you know I decided to change some things in my life I am not happy with. It’s weird one day you are perfectly happy with your life then another morning your wondering; How did I get here? It’s funny I went to a Dr. to get on a diet plan and she said loosing weight won’t help until I figure out what made me get out of shape…… I laughed. Jeez, could it be because I go for that extra piece of pizza or eat one to many cupcakes..and boy do I love cupcakes. I know what she meant, what happened to me? What made me a broken shell of a woman that would want to disfigure my body in such a way that I would want to be overweight.  Well, I could easily say it’s because I never felt loved or because I was abused when I was a child and talked down to all my life and I have a really shitty family. Boy I could go on and on but I wont for one simple reason. IT”S MY FAULT. I gained weight because I allowed it to be. Because I chose to eat instead of jog. Or watch T.V instead of play volley ball with my sister. I am the reason I am fat and I will be the reason of why I lose weight!!! This is going to be a long hard journey, one that I will fall flat on my face more than a few times and one I WILL finish. Maybe then I can get some of that self-esteem stuff I hear so much about. :).

I am fat and so much more than that

My blog is about me and my one year journey to hapiness. I seem to have allowed my life to get me off track. So I have started a one year crasher course to get back where I want to be in life. This includes my weight, school love and family. I hope you enbark on this journey where only millions have gone before.. just not in the exact same way. Love you all 🙂 Crystal